AN ADVENTURE IN PRIVATE TRANSPORTATION: Work Wife Mojo Edition
My office mate (work wife) has what I call “The Armine Mojo.” She tends to accidently drive men to obsessive behavior. For example, two years ago, she went out with a guy exactly twice, and he has texted her almost everyday since. She has never responded.
A guy who works at the administration desk downstairs once saw me photographing her for my cinematography class, and “jokingly” asked her for copies of the photos… continually… for weeks. He even stopped me once when she wasn’t there to see if I would hand them over since she didn’t seem to want to. I refused, of course.
On another occasion, unbeknownst to her, her parents invited a guy to dinner as a fix-up. She had no interest in him. Over the following month or so, he continually asked her out, offered to buy her things, and tried to take her to Paris. Even though she rebuffed him at every turn, if I remember correctly, he proposed marriage. More than once. She turned him down.
Today as she drove to work, a guy in a BMW did a double take while they were stopped at a traffic light. He then proceeded to follow her to work. When he saw that the parking garage is private, he backed his car out, and went on his way. But as she waited to cross the street to our building, he pulled up and rolled down his window.
“Excuse me, miss. Are you Persian?”
“No,” she replied.
“Are you Armenian?”
“What does my nationality have to do with anything? What do you want?”
“You’re just so beautiful. Will you have dinner with me?”
“No, thank you.”
“Drinks then?”
“No thanks. I really have to go now.” The light has changed, so she continues across the street. He calls after her.
“Please! Can I have just 10 second s more of your attention?!”
She continues to walk away. He sits in his car and watches her as she disappears into the building.
When she relayed the story, I proposed a business opportunity. Gladiatorial games. Text guy, Paris guy, picture guy, and BTW guy fight to the death. The winner gets dinner. If he wants a second dinner, he has to fight the next three obsessive suitors. I see it as a win-win. We make money, and she drastically reduces the number of unwanted pursuers.
She says she just wants to meet a guy who is not crazy. Well… good luck with that!
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