A Rematch
KEN V. BROKEN BARISTA: A Rematch The batista I broke a few weeks ago by giving him a quarter after he had already entered my order into the POS has apparently remained broken. “Hi. I’d like a large tropical iced tea with extra ice.” The batista stares at me for a few seconds. I stare back. “I don’t understand what you’re saying,” he finally pipes up. “Oh,” I say. The music is kind...
Background
ADVENTURES IN PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION: Background Overheard on the train (all are strangers): Guy1: Are they hiring where you work? Guy2: Yeah, you should apply. Guy1: Do they do a background check? Guy2: Yeah. Guy1: Can’t do it then. Guy2: They just look for felonies. Guy1: Can’t do it. They make it so hard. I mean, EVERYBODY’S got a felony. Guy3: I’ve got a felony. Guy4: I’ve got a felony! Guy5:...
The Akbar Gambit
The guy at the next table has a strong survival instinct. Woman: Do you think Jennifer Lawrence is pretty? Man: (long pause) Who? Woman: Jennifer Lawrence. Do you thinks she’s pretty? Man: I don’t know who that is. Woman: You don’t know Jennifer Lawrence? …She’s an Oscar-winning actress. Man: Don’t know her. They take a few bites of food. Woman: What about Kate Blanchett? Do you find her...
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